Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Today was a bad-turned-good day for me, EXCEPT I GOT LAGABUSED in dota at night.
Soccer training, was fine all the way till we started playing the game. I've been trying to develop a burning winning mentality that gives me the bursts of energy and inspiration to sink into crunching tackles, win the ball, and take the game in my hands.
My passing was disappointing. sure, i could do most of the simple passes but when it mattered, when the receivers were running, when a possible chance was forming up, i just had to rush the pass instead of concentrating and hitting the ball properly. GODDAMNIT, wish i could train that sort of passing myself, but if i train myself thats not possible.
I can practice dribbling and one-touch passing against the wall, i can drill my left leg to be better at passing and clearing, but i can't train the goddamned passing into space shit. AND THAT SUCKS. I have a drill in mind, that requires two other people that want to train their passing as well, so if you want to get better approach me mmkay.
I thought my team had the stronger players, i think we did have, we made quite a few chances, our build up wasn't bad, our defense was passable. WE FUCKING LOST. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! WHAT THE FUCK, I HATE LOSING!!!!! Hmm...i wasn't really super-pissed when we lost, but i'm trying to make myself FUCKING PISSED OFF that WE LOST!
After eating, arannnnnnnnnn minjian fabian and bingxiang and me went to the court neaaar bingxiang's house and after playing 2v2s and fooling around, some of the malays and minjian's riiiiiiii friend came down to play. From my experience, malays seem to regularly underestimate chinese, and for good reason because the chinese parents suck and don't alllow their kids to appreciate the awesomeness of soccer.
I felt it anyway, but we managed to win quite a number of games and gradually they began to give us more respect. Hahhhhhhh...i don't know why my finishing was so good (by my standards at least) during the game, maybe its because i'm really focussed and concentrating when i shoot.
SCORED THREE GOALS SO PAY ATTENTION.
First goal was pretty sweet, i got the ball, moved it into their half, aran was on my left giving me the option to pass, the defender chose to anticipate me passing to him, but he stuck out his leg pretty far in trying to hook the ball away, but i managed to drag it away with my left leg and quickly pushed it into a comfortable position with my right, and then shot to the bottom corner and scored D=.
Second goal was satisfying, because there was this really pissifying malay who was really rough. Not aggresive, rough, and also, liked to act cool, doing stepovers and moving slowly to er, show his skill and arrogance. He's the kind of player where if you beat him for pace, he'd just slam his body onto you and then get the ball.
Hahhhh, anyway i think it was a loose ball which i quickly played up, i had quite a lot of space but there was the pissifying malay in front of me, and he just stood there with this stance where his body was 90 degrees away from mine, just posing there. It'd be pretty hard to dribble past since he was standing close to the semi-circle line, so i'd just whacked it and it flew to the bottom corner.
Third goal was pretty lame, the ball bounced off the wall, i had a little bit of space but was in a tight angle, but went for a shot anyway, and i scored.
But the dribblling ahhhh yesssssssss, i made a few good dribbles, felt comfortable with the ball, i think i made two nice through balls, and defended pretty well. Personally i thought i was as good as most of the malays, better than some, onpar with some, but that's just me, and that's just on the street soccer court.
Aran was....being his rather evil self, because the rest of the malays didn't read my post on countering aran. A longball would just be played to him, and he'd just do a turn-shot, really quickly, and scored a lot of goals for us. ALTHOUGH, his defending wasn't that good and sometimes let them through ):
Minjian i thought, was overcommitting, trying to tackle and intercept their passes constantly, and because those malays have rather good ball control and dribbling, they got past him quite a bit, but i told him not to commmit and he did better anyway.
Fabian did okay-, sometimes he left some gaps behind while trying to be a second man to pressure the ball, and he took too much time on the ball, trying to control it before shooting. I think one thing this court experience taught us is to play it quickly and keep the ball constantly moving. Our opponenets closed down very fast, we couldn't really play our passing game, but somehow we managed to score a few goals after breaking their attacks or forcing them to commiting mistakes by pressuring, two pretty...er solo-ish goals by me, aran's lameeeeeeeeeeee but effective turnshot goals.
Later on i suggested maybe some of them were playing for youth clubs, and the group i think had the consensus that a few of them were indeed playing for the S-league youth clubs. At least on court, i think we matched them, so maybe, just maybe, we aren't that far off from the required B Div nationals soccer standard.
At least on the street soccer court, i could compete and match them, and although it's likely they'll be better than me on field presently, i take comfort in that the difference between us and them, isn't as big as i thought it was.
silverletal [Simple and Clean] 7:48 AM
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Sometimes some people ask you what's your goal in life, what's your dream, and you really have no answer to that. You go to school and do up projects, worksheets, attend lessons which you like and dislike, sign up for special programmes for the sake of it.
You don't really know how it helps, but you just do it anyway. You trust that whatever the school is providing for you is invaluable in the future, and valuable learning experiences. Special programmes seem to be insights of the outside, doing research papers that mirror the world that you grow up in.
Gradually, some people may develop a passion for certain subjects and enjoy doing it. School becomes a purposeful place to be in then, since they enjoy learning, and know for sure what they learn is applicable to what they want to do. How about the other part of some people though. Trying the goshdarned hardest to concentrate in class on something they have no interest in for academic value, (i know it's old, that's not my point) meaning that knowledge becomes dead wood.
Whats the point of life really? I think it's to make yourself as happy as possible, make it as fulfilling and fruitful as possible. Does that mean you waste away at home, on the internet since it brings you happiness? Possibly, why not? Then comes the fulfilling part. Do you feel a sense of achievement at playing it? If you do, then its a great life to have, but then, can you sustain it?
At the end of it, you need a job no matter what. Education is the key to getting jobs, but if you don't enjoy the education, why would you enjoy the job education brings about. I want to be happy in life, having a job i enjoy. But that's not always possible, perhaps impossible to some.
And that's why it's a dream. What do you do about your dream then, thinking its impossible. Give up on it? Concentrate on being another worker who goes to work for the sake of money, not for happiness? I don't want to be like that. My dream, is another one of those things you think impossible, things which stupid people love to use to tease for the sake of attention. I ain't going to be put down simply because they tease.
I won't say my dream is unlikely to come true, because i never know till i try. The chance of it happening might be small, but the chance is there. It's up to me to work on it, to increase the percentage of it. Practice, get better, practice more, improve conistently, take advantage of what i still have. Youth.
What's my dream? To play for liverpool football club one day. Ridiculous, you might say, but i told you, its a dream. A dream i want to make into reality. I know where i stand, probably at the conference level of England's football community, the lowest rung, with many divisions separating it from the English Premier League. But liverpool have achieved their dream of the 5th European cup. When they won it, nobody gave them a chance except for the Kop. They labelled it as a dream,, the same dream i have now.
What do i have at my disposal which makes my dream all the more likely? What im going to say next is probably quite elitist, but it's what i honestly feel anyway. Most obviously, intelligence. It's an awkward truth that most of the better footballers in Singapore are youths who go to school for the sake of playing football rather than studying. Controversial, elitist, maybe, but it's the awkward truth and even if you disagree on the outside, deep inside, you know it's true.
I know for a fact, few years back there was i think only 2 Singaporeans on the Singapore team who graduated from University. There are always exceptions here and there, but i think what i have said is true for the most part of it.
So, intelligence, the ability to see chances opening up, to observe and scrutinize the opponent's movement, to anticipate whether the winger is feinting or really crossing the ball. The ability to learn the mechanics of football quickly and grasp it.
Next thing i have is youth. Youth meaning i have time to practice, practice, practice, and practice. Why do you think brazillians are so amazing at soccer? It's not because of the Brazillian genes that "suddenly" makes them exclusively so good, it's simply because soccer is their life. They train and touch the ball 24/7, football is their way out of poverty, hence they put in the effort to play, and that's what i'm going to do too.
Lastly, its natural ability. I don't claim that i'm a really super-talented player, but i honestly believe i have at least a shred of talent to make things happen, a shred of natural ability. This is all very opinionated and people may scream that i'm overestimating myself and maybe i am, but from what i see, given that the past and present people i have been playing with all have roughly the same amount of "playtime" with the ball, i think i'm one of the better players.
To hear that fans sing "You Will Never Walk Alone" in unison, to support their players and show their faith in them, that is beautiful. The incredible "give me the ball, i'll give you a goal" ability of Steven Gerrard, the camaraderie that always exists amongst liverpool players, you can feel it and see it. I don't think i've ever heard one player in Liverpool who talked bad about the club.
It's quite incredible really, hearing the supporters sing and chorus the song "You Will Never Walk Alone", whether winning or losing. 3-0 down to AC Milan at halftime, the fans continued their support, and if i imagine myself as a Liverpool player, i'd have to say The Kop are the greatest fans in the world. We came back to draw 3-3, then win in penalties, and i think a large part of that was due to the will to fight for the fans, to bring back the glory of the European Cup to Anfield.
As for now, i'm going to work on my dream by practicing whenever possible, drilling myself and enjoying it, because i know i enjoy seeing the improvements in my play.
And fight to realise that dream.
silverletal [Simple and Clean] 5:12 AM
Sunday, November 05, 2006
After all that period of thinking, maturing, flaming, i've come upon a few (obvious) conclusions to share
Number one is that some people act a lot different depending on the age, status, gender of a person.
You can't call someone fake because he spouts vulgarities in front of his friends but refrains from it in front of girls. You can't say he is putting on a facade, cause niggas are teh pwn, and also because its a basic human thing to treat people differently according to their status. To teachers and parents you have to show your respect in a very direct manner such as greeting, but you don't have to do that with friends.
In front of girls, a guy probably doesn't want to make himself look like a-er hooligan, but why's that? If every guy acts like a hooligan, a hooligan will become the norm. The fact is, most guys try to be the gentleman in front of those who they want to impress. Is being gentlemanly to only females fake? No cause it's gay to be gentlemanly to males, it just ain't cool nigs.
Number two Online VS Real-life, Pros and Cons of each.
Online, anything you say is worth less(KILL THE SPACE AND YOU READ "WORTHLESS"). You can avoid awkward confrontations such as awkward silence, you can ask sensitive questions, you can become piss someone off without feeling awkward and the words just roll off easier online. (ACTUALLY THAT DEPENDS. TOUCHING GIRLS = PISS FAST)
And why? Cause you get to think. You get to research on the internet on sensitive questions, you get to test your dream guy's feeling by going "hey junyang, wanna make out with me?" and when i say "TOO UGLY TOO UGLY, I AM TOO CARRY", they'll go "lol my friend was crapping around on my comp" while crying after being rejected by me. And i'll go "yea, i thought you were fooling around, you so pretty how can be ugly? (:"
You can be more approachable by screaming in CAPS LOCK "HIS PALMS ARE SWEATY KNEES WEAK ARMS ARE HEAVY" RAPPING IN AN ONLINE CHANNEL and (NORMAL) people will know you're fooling around and fool around with you too. But it's strange to SCREAM IN CAPSLOCK in public places cause everyone thinks you're insane and it hurts your vocals. And, while screaming online is cool, screamin in real-life is not ): .
Online items are worth less, so you can help some poor guy out by giving him some gold and shiz and make a friend, simple as that. In real-life, its not as easy to come across a chance to help, and parents go DON'T TALK TO STRANGERS and it takes a longer time to be more er- friendly with the other guy in real-life.
So those are the pros. And the cons is simply it's worthless.
In real-life, you can't do much last minute research. Your knowledge is what you have on the streets and you can't add to it. So if you sound knowledgeable in something, you sound all that much more convincing cause the other party knows you ain't doing LAST MINUTE RESEARCH GOOGLE.
In real-life you can't really put on another persona that's quite unlike, unless you GOOD at acting, and it'll feel weird. If you're a great guy people will think you're a great guy online. If you make a friend in real-life, maybe you can't go WTF YOU SUCK online but you can kick up a conversation immediately when you see him as opposed to if you only knew him online before that.
If you look into someone's eyes (especially a prettaye girl) you can shock her with your eyes, but it's hard to seduce a girl with words cause words = nerdy. If you help someone in streets basketball soccer goal dribblie stepovers sweaty palms weak YOU GET THE PICTURE.
Number 3, Rapping is something you can do, when you have nothing to do, and look cool, and not a silent fool looking like a stunned mule.
PERSONAL EXPERIENCE.
Number 4, It's hard to stay away from following the crowd, but once you get the courage to do it, it becomes easy from there.
I remember in primary 5 or something, there was this guy called gareth and he was quite the popular guy, though at that point i think he was half-nice, half-mean cause he seems to have this shit going on where a lot of the guys followed him and half the time i was too, but eventually i felt quuiite an idiot and tried to mix with the other classes (despite the EVER-EVIDENT MAINERS - GEPPERS boundary) and played soccer with em.
You know i went to church today, first time there and when the person in charge asked for us to rise and sing some hymms i was fighting in my mind. I'm not a christian, do i stand along with them and sing, or should i sit down. Another thought came into my mine, that being in their House of God, even if i didn't believed, i oughta show some respect to their beliefs and stand along, even if i didn't sing.
Later on, they had this time for prayer and all of a sudden everyone got onto their knees and started praying. Karen told me i didn't have to do the same, which was a great help cause i didn't want to, but you know, in that environment where everyone around you is a believer of god, praying on their knees and you are the odd one out, there was this calling to follow the crowd. But surprisingly, i managed to brush it off with ease, maybe cause of karen's prompting, or maybe it's just proof that i find it easier not to follow the crowd after i've told myself all these years not to.
Number 5
On topics you are ignorant about, STAY ON THE FUCKING FENCE AND DON'T ACT LIKE YOU'RE PRO AND SHIT CAUSE YOU'VE READ A FEW ARTICLES AND WATCHED SOME TV.
It so pisses me off to see people diss chinese kungfu (CAUSE ITS THE CHINESE PRIDE), just because they watch fighting tournamonts or have practiced some sort of martial art. Wing-chun is chinese kungfu, and it's known to be effective. Before you make silly judgements, try to do some research and BE someone knowledgeable before spouting all your shit.
Same for people who don't know soccer and act as if it's a really easy sport to play, dissing, dissing, and more dissing. Don't compare world-class standards, the english premier league where soccer is a job, to secondary school level. Don't impress upon YOUR standard of football that you think people should play and expect people to be able to play up your expectations.
Don't know shit, shutup, simple, stupid.
Number 6, Great things come out from inspiration.
Check out ryan gigg's fa cup goal on youtube. Check out tracy mcgrady's 13 points in 43 second effort to carry his team to a 1 point victory. Most of my blog posts were written in inspiration. This ain't one of them, sadly, and it quite feels old. Actually. Feels im repeating myself. Over. Over.
SO check this out, check this out
Stupid thug, stupid lout
All you do is shit and shout
Pathetic, crude, brute, vulgarities
Smacks of Cowardice
How bout using those fists
To be an angel, not a beast
To help, not whelp
Get the bravery, the courage
To end slavery,
Or you afraid, of not getting laid
Getting shamed and blamed
For doing things the long way,
Stead of the short 'n 'wrong play,
Catch what i say?
silverletal [Simple and Clean] 6:10 AM